| 27 August 2010
Mario Kart Wii was in the second episode of WCG Ultimate Gamer 2, so I decided to watch, being the Mario Kart fanatic that I am. Spoilers following the jump.
The second episode of WCG Ultimate Gamer 2 featured Mario Kart Wii. I told myself before the show's season began that I would watch only two episodes: the first one, and whatever episode had Mario Kart Wii. I really don't want to get caught up in all of this. I've said it a billion times; I'd rather see a tournament than a reality show. I'd take Adam Sessler at Evolution over this, because Adam Sessler was at a tournament.
So, in a way, I'm kind of happy Mario Kart Wii is the second episode; I've fulfilled my personal committment, and now it doesn't matter anymore to me what happens. Yeah, it'd be cool if one of the California players won -- I've interviewed all of them, and all but one were really nice to me. The other didn't really care much, but that was because at the time I just started the site, so it didn't strike me as a superstar blowing off the press.
I decided to do a log of my thoughts as the show was going on.
= = =
11 p.m.: OK I'm kind of anticipating it. I'm wondering how they're going to interpret the game. Will it be leveled out so the best racers win? Eh, who the fuck am I kidding. Blue shells and more blue shells! Oh baby, I can't wait. Oh snap, they replayed the Kat vs Vanessa mindgames. I'm guessing this is really going to get played up this episode since Kat survived. Who is getting eliminated? As long as it's not Justin, Faye, Vanessa or Clown, it's all good in my opinion. I don't care about the others, I'm non plus.
11:02 p.m.: Oh the cheesy grins as Kat returns. The Antelope Valley. THE ANTELOPE VALLEY.
11:04 p.m.: I thought this was Mario Kart Wii Day ... it's a commercial, I mean, it's a mobile thingy something challenge. Ahh, I can tell why they did that already, it now makes it a 5-on-5. Good stuff to A.J.
11:06 p.m.: Justin, why would you admit that? Ha ha.
11:10 p.m.: Faye bailed on the water, then in a cut interview, she said, "Dude, I've gotta stop sucking so much." Oh no no no no no no. The director doesn't put that in without foreshadowing something to come.
11:12 p.m.: Justin just got hit by an EX tidal wave, so now we go to commercial with Justin's life hanging in the balance. As they come back from commercial, Justin is talking and all is right with the world.
11:17 p.m.: Faye and Rachel had 15 points ... but another team had less. So maybe that foreshadowing was just all for naught.
11:19 p.m.: FUCK THE WHEEL.
11:19:01 p.m.: Ok, whomever is going into the elimination match is royally screwed. Very screwed. Kat and Ryan are talking blah blah blah, so let me say ... every wheel player I've faced off in person I've beaten. The wheel is a crutch. You don't hold the wheel like you're driving a regular car; the best way to control it is by flat steering, like a school bus or big rig. There is a big difference in how you handle the game based on what controller. The nunchuck is the second worse, but the wheel BY FAR sucks, horribly. Now I'm really hoping that Faye and Justin aren't in the elimination contest.
11:27 p.m.: I saw two low-tier karts. Did they not know the bikes are the best? Ahhh, who am I kidding?
11:31 p.m.: Next commercial. So I'm wondering, since Faye pulled out the "I'm good on the Wii" quote, I wonder if whomever finished in first will send her into elimination to knock off whomever got last? It's something I wondered about last year, make it one of these contests:
- 1. Send in the person that hates Last Place Finisher and make it a grudge match.
- 2. Send in the best player in that game and make it a layup (but in this case, who is that going to be? I don't remember any racers or Mario Kart Wii specialists as part of the 12).
- 3. Send in another scrub and make it a scrub vs scrub match.
If A.J. does get first, I wonder if he sends in Faye. What would happen if Faye got bounced? That would be hilarious.
11:35 p.m.: It'll be Sebastian vs someone. Someone has to tell Sebastian to pick Funky Kong and Bowser Bike. That's his best chance of staying in. Since he knows he's in, he has extra time to practice. He needs to get on the wheel right away. And now there's a scene where he's NOT practicing. Come on, man.
11:38 p.m.: By the way, 38 minutes into the show, I've seen 3 seconds of Mario Kart Wii. Strangle me.
11:43 p.m.: Sebastian's opponent is ... A.J. Oh wow. I was thinking Faye Faye Faye Faye. It might actually be a good pick, because (in the realm of reality show competition) if A.J. gets bounced, Faye could be the next one to go, seeing as she might not have that strong backer anymore.
11:45 p.m. Why are they using karts!??!?!! It must be in the rules that they have to use karts, because Faye should know that the bikes are best. Also, thank goodness it's a 3-game series, because if someone gets screwed by a blue shell in Race 1, I'd get pissed. Standard Medium Kart, which I've now seen a few times, is OK, but it is not great compared to the bikes. I think the other is the Wild Wing, not totally sure. It's about a 5-5, if you want to go there. Should be very interesting.
11:49 p.m.: Almost gametime. If I were both of them, I'd start the race off by bumping into the other. Since it's a kart, they won't lose speed, and they can use it as an intimidation factor. Then again, they might be too scared to do it, with their show life on the line. It looks like DK Summit and Wario's Gold Mine will be two of the three, since those were shown the most. Oh! I just remembered that these guys might not be using the same-kart glitch, so it's not going to be a 50-50 matchup.
11:52 p.m.: I'd love to go to the CGS arena, I mean, Samsung Stadium, and play Mario Kart Wii in front of a big audience.
11:54 p.m.: Coconut Mall is terrible because it's guaranteed because they're going to run into the Wii Cars at the end. I guarantee it. Then it's DK Summit, and Wario's Gold Mine. I can't believe I predicted those two right.
11:55 p.m. AJ is NOT doing trick boosts!
11:55 p.m.: Sebastian got hit. I knew it. ... oh shit, BLUE SHELL. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha hah aha ha ha ha ha
11:56 p.m.: Another blue shell?!?!?! No, I don't care that they both got one. That is terrible.
11:56 p.m.: A.J. had the right idea of going on the edge to save time, especially on DK Summit where time can be shaved, but he failed at that.
11:57 p.m.: Oh, Joel with the red boost commentary.
11:57 p.m.: Wario's Gold Mine is really bad with the mines at the end. A.J. fell really bad. Now he's really far behind failing at the controls. And he got the dark cloud, this is over. Lock it up for Sebastian.
Midnight: The first race was probably the most exciting, blue shells aside. If Sebastian knew about the trick boosts that could be done on many of the bumps in the mall, he could have won the race, blue shells aside. But they were probably playing it safe just to get a feel for what was going on.
= = =
Post-show thoughts: The reality stuff is reality stuff. There's no other Wii game, except for maybe Brawl, that could have entertained the people at Samsung Stadium. So if a Wii game had to be in, it was going to be Mario Kart Wii.
I don't think Mario Kart Wii was represented that well on the show. They were playing up the Wii Resort, which was 70 percent of the "game" part of the show, and then there was the mad rush to implement Mario Kart Wii in the brain.
It's much different than saying, "One race to win in Forza III, I think I'll pick a B.M.W. 325i." People get that; most people would know what that is. It's a real car, therefore, there isn't much explaining to do, thus nothing much else to show, gamewise. However, Mario Kart Wii involves karts, items, riding the corners, etc. They had, on my log, 22 minutes to do it, and I don't think it was done well. All a potential Mario Kart fan got out of it was these things:
- The blue shell is overpowering.
- Karts are great (not true)
- You have to drift and get a red boost to get real speed (sort of true)
- The blue shell is overpowering.
I'm betting that bikes were not allowed because it would have been bad for television (bikes in Mario KART?), but that should have been allowed because those are the best, and the show is about finding who is the best.
With bikes not allowed, A.J. and Sebastian should have picked the Quacker Standard Small (why did I say Quacker? I meant Standard Small) and any of the babies. Then again, I think they were probably forced to go Mario vs Luigi to catch the eyes of the people in the stadium and on television (Luigi has a 2 point boost aka he's higher tier). The same-character glitch should have also been allowed, so it was a 5-5 going in.
Hopefully Mario Kart Wii will get another shot in the spotlight. I doubt it. This game got blue shell'd.
